Low Maintenance - With Strawberries and Whipped Cream, Please

If you looked in the dictionary for the phrase 'low maintenance,' you would likely find a photo of me eating strawberry pancakes, crepes or French toast. Every once in a while, I'll protest to my darling husband that I am, in fact, 'high maintenance,' because I have made him feed our pet pigs. At which point, he'll fall onto the floor laughing and have trouble breathing for several minutes thereafter.

I am married because hubby realized that any girl who would consciously choose 'the Denny's next to my place because they have great food' as the end of a first date in Los Angeles had to be snatched up before someone else got wise to her charm. That's right. I'm in a city known for excess - oxygen bars, expensive chocolate, coffee pressed through cloth made by out of silk pulled from the bodies of tiny caterpillars bred for their ability to add fruit flavors to food - and all I want is a place that serves a good breakfast.

Such a breakfast, or in this case, breakfast-for-lunch, opportunity presented itself to me today as I strolled down Ventura Boulevard. I am attempting to eat healthier, which means that I turned down the offer of a muffin as my mid-morning snack and stuck with my black tea. My taste buds were not, however, in the mood for salad, and they weren't in the mood for any of the fast food burger type places, nor did I crave a gyro, Subway sandwich, or Chinese food. (Weight Watchers would have very strongly cautionary tales to tell about the block I work on.) But there was IHOP - the International House of Pancakes, which is, in a somewhat ironic twist as far as I'm concerned, staffed entirely by people native to either California or Baja California. The tall peaked blue roof beckoned like a neon sign for my tummy. "Eat here. Eat here!" The little chairs and tables set in the very small outdoor patio were vacant, but practically every table inside was full, and the parking lot didn't have a spot available.

Book in hand (always travel with a book - it makes waiting completely bearable), I asked for a table for one and got a full-sized booth all to myself. The IHOP special this month is strawberry craziness. Your choice of the usual breakfast foods in various combos - 2 eggs, bacon, sausage, and hashbrowns - comes with one of three things - stuffed strawberry French toast, strawberry pancakes or a strawberry crepe stuffed with sweet cream cheese filling and strawberries, drizzled with icing and strawberries. Guess which one I chose? You get to come with me for the next breakfast at lunch if you guess the crepe.

And that's really the size of it - I am always happy with a plate of eggs, bacon and some rich, yummy form of carbohydrate. Most times I'll opt for French toast, because people rarely screw that up. But a crepe filled to the delicious brim with soft, gooey cream cheese filling and whole strawberries? I'm the queen of Sheba.

So, yes, some women may need a closet full of shoes to feel fully alive, or just the right side table in their antique collection. Some men may fill their garage to bursting with expensive power tools or vintage automobiles. As for me, you'll find me at a local diner with family, friends, or a good book, contentedly enjoying a magnificent breakfast.